Automated response system: If this is an emergency, hang up immediately and dial 911. If you are a hospital or doctor, press 1 because your call is important to us. If you are calling to make your first appointment with this office, press 2. If you
Annoyances
Testy: A Story
I don’t realize how out of it I am after an operation until looking back a month later. There I was, the morning after the surgery. “Morning after” seems apt because it’s like a hangover, except without the really bad headache but with no prospect of
Bacon Jam
Could any food name excite more disgust? Yet bacon jam is what my friend and neighbor turned up with at my door three weeks ago. He said it was “amazing,” but he’s always saying something or someone is amazing. If they’re not amazing, they’re
The Pain Game
How do you rate your pain on a scale of one to ten? The question is such a commonplace that when I complain about it to friends, they shrug and say, “They all ask that.” Why did this seemingly innocuous question annoy me? One hurdle I had to
Advice: A Story
Ever noticed how we can't complain without giving each other advice? "The way I'm eating in this pandemic, I'm going to turn into a beached whale." — Don't you exercise? — "Like I told you, I have a stationary bike." — Oh right, what you
Who Said That?
Did Mark Twain say, “The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why”? The quotation was included one morning in a post to a list for writers that I belong to. A man I’ll call Pangloss, after the